Save A Horse
by ShadowFire52
Summary: After annoying a certain englishmen to wits end with his horse Arthur decides to save a horse a certain way...oneshot


Ok so I got this idea while I was searching DeviantArt being bored as usual. The story didn't come out as good as possible. I dedicate this to **kyuubimonster** on deviant art who drew the picture that gave me the idea.

Now I don't own hetalia and only partly the plot and I hope ya like!

- - -X X X X- - -

He sat there, impatiently waiting for his loud mouth cousin and that...other guy...that always seem to fallow around with that bear. Kuma-whatever He didn't really care. He sat there and sipped his tea. Already he had been there for what- two hours and about nine cups of tea.

Soon he heard the original Yankee Doodle play loudly and he let out a chuckle. The song always did make him laugh. He pulled his phone from his pocket and answered.

"Ello Alfred." he said and scrunched his large eyebrows as he held the phone from his ear.

"YO! ARTIE! Sorry imma lil' late! Was passin' 'long the bus station when s'me guy asked me 'bout my horse!" he heard over the phone in a good southern accent.

"BLOODY TWIT! You are NOT a little late! YOU'RE TWO HOURS LATE!" Arthur screamed "GET YOUR BLOODLY WEASTERN ASS OVER HERE BEFORE I SHOOT YOU WITH YOU'RE OWN GUN!" there was then silence on the other end that shocked the Englishman "Alfred? Did you fall into a man hole again?"

"A-Arthur? It's Matthew..." a quiet voice then answered.

Arthur took a minute to remember "Oh! Matthew! It's been a while lad!"

"Y-Yes it has...S-soory that we're so l-late. R-really soory." he apologized.

"It's alright. Now where are you both?"

Matthew told him where "He ac-actually got a r-real h-horse..." the Canadian said and a muffled 'no horsie...don't chew my hair...' was heard.

"That git..." Arthur mumbled.

The conversation went on for a while before they had to hang up because Alfred's horse kept bothering Matthew on the other end. He got up with a sigh and adjusted his costume in the mirror. It was a handmade pirate costume.

"I must say Arthur. You've out done yourself this time." he said to himself and adjusted his CAPTIAN HAT. It immediately fell to the floor when the door was slammed open.

"HHHHHHHHHEY! THE HERO'S HERE!" a familiar voice yelled and clips and clops were heard.

"YOU TWAT! HAVEN'T YOU HEARD OF KNOCKING!" Arthur yelled as he picked up his hat. His face fell and his eyes went wide at the sight.

There were his cousins. One was dressed as a mountie. The other a cowboy. The mountie was sitting behind the cowboy looking deathly afraid as he should and was holding tightly to his polar bear. The cowboy on the other hand was grinning and sitting in front. What were they sitting on?

They were sitting on Alfred's horse.

In Arthur's house.

The oldest of the three blew a gasket*.

"WHY THE HELL DID YOU BRING YOU'RE GOD DAM HORSE INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE!" Arthur screamed at the top of his lungs.

The horse whinnied and Alfred pet its head "It's alright boy..."

"YOU BROUGHT A HORSE. INTO. MY. HOUSE." Arthur growled. As he pulled out his "fake" pirate sword.

"Yo Artie, it's just a horse." Alfred said in defense.

"Get it out of my house!" Arthur yelled and held up his sword.

Alfred made the horse trot over to the other "C'mon! It's just a horse! It's not gonna make a mess!"

The horse must not have been listening because it took that moment to sneeze and get horse snot all over the short man. There was a silence between the three people and the horse before screaming and laughter took place between two of them.

"ALFRED!"

"It was the horse!"

Arthur fumed and his face was bright red in anger. He started swearing at the top of his lungs to wear possibly the whole town could hear him and maybe the next town over. Soon the small man stopped off to change.

"A-Al..." Matthew squeaked out "Y-You should a-apologize..."

"He was mad for no reason Mattie. It's not the horse's fault." the younger of the two brothers responded. He paused when they smelled something and looked back and both made a face "That...may have been his fault..."

"Al..." Matthew mumbled.

"Fine fine. I'll apologize for that." Alfred said and they both turned when they heard grumbling.

There stood their older cousin with a fuzzy white lined red cape and matching crown in the doorway with his arms crossed. Both of the brothers started to laugh and Alfred even fall off the horse and continue to laugh.

"It's the homoking!" Alfred howled out in his laughter and whipping the tears from his eyes.

Arthurs face turned red once more as he stomped over to his cousin and stepped down on the other's manhood causing the laughter to stop. Arthur shot a glare at Matthew who instantly stopped laughing.

"Artie! You- augh fuck that hurt..." Alfred mumbled. He opened his mouth to say something else when his cell phone went off and all three loudly heard _'Save a horse ride a cowboy~'_ sung through the house.

Alfred slowly answered his phone and started to start up a conversation. Arthur got a smirk and started to help Matthew from the horse.

- - -one conversation later- - -

"Well I'll see ya then Kiku!" Alfred said as he closed the phone and was now over the pain so he stood up and looked around. There was something missing. Matthew was there. Arthur was there. Alfred was there.

"Heeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyy...where's my horse?" Alfred asked as he looked around. Before he knew it he was tackled to the ground by Arthur and a shock collar was attached to his neck.

He pushed the small man off him and sat up "What the hell is this?" he asked as he started to pull at the collar before getting a shock through his body.

"AUGH!" Alfred screamed.

Arthur smirked and held up a remote "Shock collar. And I let your horse run off."

"Do you know how long it took me to get that horse!"

"No and frankly, I don't care." Arthur said.

"Get this off me!" Alfred yelled and got another shock when trying to undo the collar.

"No. Now get on all fours." Arthur said as he crossed his arms.

There was a silence.

"Artie..." Alfred started "that sounds really wrong."

"Just shut the fuck up and do it." Arthur said annoyed.

Alfred opened his mouth to say something but closed his mouth and got on all fours when Arthur held up the remote.

"Ah. Good lad." Arthur said and walked over to Alfred and sat on his back.

"OMPH! Artie! Man you're getting fat!" Alfred yelled as the other sat and got a shock and almost fell over.

"A-Arthur...What are you doing...?" Matthew asked quietly.

"Saving a horse. Now let's go." Arthur said and slapped the side of Alfred's head.

"Hey! I'm not being a horse! GET OFF ARTIE!"

"I'm just doing as the song says. Save a horse. Ride a cowboy. Now yah." Arthur said with a smirk.

- - -X X X X- - -

*Blowing a gasket- If you don't know it's getting really pissed. Like steam outta ears in crtoons pissed. That's blowing a gasket.

Well that's it to this!

Hope ya liked it!

Please review!

clicky!


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